Walking out

I haven't blogged much lately.

Things have been rather overwhelming for me, especially in terms of career. I don't know if I made a wrong first step, only time will tell. It's topsy-turvy. Don't get me wrong, it's not about who or what I got into trouble with. It simply wasn't the ideal 'marriage' per se. More like a shotgun, then you realize that the person who is waking up beside you everyday probably isn't the right one for you.

I did have a brush with sales jobs in the past, when someone tried to sweet-talk me into my namesake - MLM. Sure, the fresh air-con, the bustling office environment and the ra-ra gangs - they did entice me quite a bit, to be honest. However, I have never felt comfortable doing it. It was a warning sign that I failed to heed. So I landed in this sales job, but probably I should have never done so because my attributes are simply not cut out for it. Presentations? Sure, I can do them. Pretty well. But meeting people, strangers even? Don't get me wrong. I can hold a conversation, but too bad - sales is an emotional thing. I am not good with touching people emotionally, especially at the crucial moment. Therefore, no sale.

Let me tell you that the sales that I am doing isn't easy. Lots of initiatives and drive have to be generated within yourself. And you are very much on your own. Once your fuel is gone, that's it. Nobody is going to top it up for you other than yourself. That's what exactly happened to me - I am tired. Jaded. But at least I found out the truth before it gets even worse. Keep on going home empty-handed, feet dragging? No good. I know of a lot of people like that, but seriously it isn't a good sign if one is being burnt out so quickly.

Do I think of myself as a failure? I am tempted to, but fortunately V counseled me out of it. For those of you who don't know who 'V' is, she is my fiancee. Someone I would dare to say that she's the best woman I have ever met, who has been very loving and supportive even during these tough times. Right now, I am focusing on getting back to what I can do well in - either chemical engineering or possibly banking. How long will I take before I get to go to work again? I don't know. With this supposedly recovering economy, even with a degree, it's still damn hard. God damn hard. But I am a fighter. I will continue fighting unless I am dead.

As for V, I feel very sorry for her sometimes because as her beloved one, I cannot provide much material support as of now. I am floundering in the rapids myself. But I will get out of it one day - and when that day comes, she'll get this support that she had fully deserved.

Walking out is never easy, be it from a place or from someone. It requires tremendous courage sometimes, but you just have to bite the bullet and move on. There will surely be greener pastures elsewhere, let these seasoned feet of mine carry me to those pastures. The sun will shine once again, for even light and darkness take turns to manifest its presence.

For those readers who have followed me thus far, sorry for not providing updates regularly. I will try to post more stuff when I have more time. Right now, I am entrenched in a war zone.

Past and Present Condo

I haven't been exactly the luckiest person around. I have had a lot of knocks and stumbles throughout the years and sometimes, I am tempted to be resigned to fate - something which is against my personality. Why? Because I am a fighter.

But the catch is, fighters will invariably tire one day. And lately, in the past one or two years, I am indeed tired. Hence, gone - or rather, adjusted was my attitude towards the honors and the accolades, as well as the hearts and the flowers. I don't fight as hard as I used to - or rather, be as obsessed as I was in the past. The previous Condo had been written into the historical annals. The current Condo is an improved and very different version of the past one.

I have not been the luckiest person in heart matters. I used to be the one who has the romance tabloids draped all over me, with those factually uninvited but overly enthusiastic 'friends' who broadcast my interest unabashedly to completely unintended parties. The news would spread like fire, but ironically, I would become frozen instead. Frozen because of a mixture of fear, reluctance and dismissiveness. Again and again, this happened umpteen times.

Although it was only about a couple of years away, I have nearly forgotten what it feels like to be in love with someone. Those fleeting liaisons, stashed away amongst the archives of time, seemed so faraway but can be surprisingly stark and vivid. The touches, the smiles. The moments spent smirking by the telephone cord as the tone of an apparently unattractive counterpart (to others, but not to me) filled my ears. And the memories of the footsteps down the dusty, washed away dirt paths. Sometimes, they do not want to spare me, hence they came to haunt me before I sink into a slumber. Tears would occasionally overflow and speckles of sodium chloride would remain on the pillow sheet cometh the very next ray of sunlight.

That was it, until I met her.

She is a very unique lady. One whom, I am afraid, could not be replicated in any form or imitation. Her eyes sparkle with determination and intellect, but are also full of emotions. Such beautiful eyes! I found mine transfixed onto hers, and eventually hers onto mine. She is no Megan Fox, Mariah Carey and what not, but her brand is extremely out-of-this-world. It was a very difficult road leading up to this point, but a very memorable one as well. There were many a time that nothing would remain, it could have been. Could have been. But finally, fate has decided to do me a favor this time. Corners have turned. And I see from afar that the familiar silhouette is gradually growing larger.

And then there was the hug. Only a hug, you say. However, it probably was one of the most meaningful and emotional one that I have had. Nothing beats that. Like the feeling that you have found your long lost, half-piece of pendant which you thought you could never find it again. The saunter beneath the moonlight and the gentleness that shroud me, are both destined to become timeless classics.

Thanks to the heaven, I have found you.

Aliens

Ever felt like an alien before?

Note that by the word 'alien', I don't necessarily mean those little green customers that you used to, or perhaps even love to, see on those TV screens. In those sci-fi movies. The 'alien' in this context has more to do with the physiological make-up - that is, if you frequently feel that you are constantly out of sync with the people around you, like nobody ever resembles you remotely, that would qualify you as an alien in my context.

And let me tell you this, being an alien sometimes doesn't make one feel good. Humans are social creatures, that much we know, and it doesn't feel good to be left out, even inadvertently, does it? However, sometimes it is inevitable - after all, one can only try to 'close up' the gaps to a certain extent. It becomes trying and tiring to bring it further than that. Hence, sometimes it is better to just preserve your own flavor.

Or seek another alien. With the world getting so unforgivingly congested, surely there must be other aliens amidst all the 'normal people'? Yes. That is possible, in every sense. But the catch is this - aliens are to be met, not sought for.

Fortunately for me, I have met another alien myself since last month. Let's call her V. For anyone here who is itching to know what V does, where she comes from, etc etc - I am sorry. I am not here to reveal all these. Plus, it would be blasphemy to the agreement between two aliens to reveal such heavenly secrets. Then, what's the point of talking about her? You ask.

Well, it's the special bond. The special bond which only two aliens can share with each other. It's akin to someone who can automatically and precisely decipher your code-laden words without you having to apply the 'layman dictionary', like you would do when communicating with those who are obviously not as alien as you are. Someone who could comprehend your emotions and experiences without passing them off as episodes of mundane existence. Someone whom you could actually relate with without having to turn your full-body armor to maximum thickness, like you do with your everyday dealings with others in your office, etc etc etc.

I am lucky to have met you, V. Just when I have kept to myself my deepest thoughts for many months, when I thought that it would be a futile effort to try to create bridges that the other party would have scant interest in trying to reach out towards me with equal measure. I do not know how long our association would last, but I hope it would, for as long as humanly possible.

For now, I have to sign off. V: if you see this, you would understand what I am driving at.

For those who don't, well - you are probably an alien in your own right, but not the same type as me. No matter, you will have your own group of aliens to associate with too. After all, as I mentioned earlier, rapport building is very much a humanistic trait and instinct.

Japan Travelogue - Hailing from the Land of Instant Noodles

Remember my previous post on the first impressions of Japan? Those were some of the very new things that I have come to realized about the country - and refreshingly so. The next pressing concern upon touching down, other then lodging and accomodation? It's obviously food. Granted, there are already plenty of options when it comes to Japanese food here in Singapore, but there's nothing like having a first-hand experience of them in their own land is it? Tempted? Read on to whet your buds even more! ;)

The very first oddity that dawned upon me is the general absence of food courts, something that has been so commonplace to me. Rather, there was an abundance of food outlets, scattered all over the place. If you want something more posh, of course there are plenty of restaurants for you to choose from too - but be prepared to get your pocket burned. A plate of assorted sushi, containing six to eight pieces of them, already cost something in the range of $25. Even the 'normal' meals don't come cheap, with prices in the range of 450 to 650 yen ($7 to $10) being the norm, such as the bowl of ramen below:

A bowl of spicy ramen

Noodles and rice make up the bulk of Japanese cuisines. For the noodles, apart from ramen, there are soba (a brownish type of noodle that resembles the local yee mian) and u-don (thick, white noodles) for you to choose from. Not a fan of noodles? You can try out their rice too, as shown in the picture below:

Typical combo set

The main attributes of Japanese rice lie in their texture and size - first of all, the grains are generally more 'plump' but shorter; also, they appear to be more sticky than the rice I have been used to, such as the Royal Umbrella brand. Being stickier also allows it to be made into convenient dumpling-like meals, such as the onigiri:

Japanese bakzhang!

It's always handy to have a couple of these in your bag, especially during those seemingly never-ending Shinkansen rides. Two is enough to satiate your hunger, while having more is fine too - if you can take it. These 'bakzhangs' come in a variety of flavor, and the main ingredients are seaweed, rice and the core - which can be anything from salmon to mayonnaise tuna. And an additional plus to these 'bakzhangs' are its price - with everything else so pricey, having a couple of them at approximately 100 to 130 yen (~$2) seem like a catch!

Other than the onigiri, another type of food that might come in handy would be the bento, which is equivalent to the mixed vegetable rice locally. These bentos don't come cheap either, with prices ranging from about 400 yen to 750 yen normally. And an additional downside is, you can't customize your own dish - so you may need to depend on your luck in coming across one that you like. If you do, it is usually a wholesome and balanced meal:

Munching on one during rush hour

Being in Japan, it was almost an imperative to try out sushi, which I did on one of the days in the later part of my travels. As the conventional ones were too expensive, we had to do some leg work to land our butts in a sushi bar - the conveyor-belt type. The sushi there were much more afforable at 105 yen each and came in large varieties. Me and my friends gobbled down at the plates like hungry wolves and in the end, each of us finished about six to seven plates - and the total cost was still at an affordable $10-ish. However, sorry for the absence of pictures! Guess we were too engrossed then. Heh. :p

I bet you must be a bit tempted to try them out yourselves? Oooh wait. I think I forgot about something. What is it? That's right! The instant noodles! How can I not talk about them when Japan is, technically, the land of instant noodles? After all, these handy little stuff was invented by a Japanese guy back in the 1950s (I think) for convenience sake and it became such a blast later on. As with other food, their instant noodles are quite pricey too - selling at about 200 to 300 yen ($3 to approximately $5) per bowl. However, there is no reason not to try them, for all their flavors looked so foreign to me! None of the locally available flavors are sold there - there is just no overlap between the two. Rather, the flavors available for selection are very Japanese-based: salted chicken, milky pork flavor, dry noodles with soy sauce, etc. And it sure felt different when one is staying in a Japanese inn-typed hotel, slurping away at the noodles while donned in traditional Japanese robes and sitting on the tatami - very authentic Japanese feeling.

All in all, it's rather easy looking for food in Japan, provided that you are amply loaded and have some legs - 'cos the primary downside is, you have got to walk a bit if you want things on the cheaper end - and the maps are pretty bad in the sense that, only major buildings and road names are shown. Besides, there is an abundance of convenience stores located throughout Japan - and you would come to familiarize with them, such as the Family Mart links. There's also a wide selection of foodstuffs in their supermarkets, and you will find yourself dragging loads and loads of shopping bags home, if you do know where to go.

Of course, the genres of food don't end here - there are more of them, such as the grilled meat, herbal soups and such - but for the lack of time, I did not get to try them. But no worries! For the shortage in food, the load of cultural immersion and brushes with danger more than make up for this regret - and I'll show you why and how.

Japan Travelogue - Everything Peculiar

We come across many things Japanese in our everyday life - most notably, their game consoles, electrical products, etc. And not to mention, the NSFW stuffs that we could be all too familar with. But what is it really like to be personally in Japan and experiencing everything Japanese? If this intrigues you, then you have come to the right place! Here, you will find episodes revealing different facets of this fascinating country, courtesy of my ten-day trip. ;)

The very first things that dawned upon me upon my arrival are the peculiarities - and as the days go by, more and more of them were either overtly or subtly discovered. Firstly, it's the currency - the Japanese do not use cents. At all. Part of the reason might be because their currency is weaker compared to ours? Anyway, here's a snapshot of some Japanese coins:

Japanese coins

And Japanese notes:

Japanese notes - 10,000 yen

Speaking of currency exchange, 10,000 yen is approximately equivalent to 150 SGD, which makes product price range of a few to tens of thousands commonplace. But that doesn't make the coins useless! In fact, you will often need them while purchasing small items and tickets, such as the ones shown below:

A flurry of tickets

The Japanese seems to have a strong inclination towards use of tickets - lots of stuffs are being ticketed, including food (an example of one such ticket, is the one on the top left-hand corner - it says that I have purchased one set of fried pork with raw ginger)! However, I also have to say this is much more convenient than the queuing system that we have here in Singapore - and it minimizes the error in cooking the wrong meal as well! However, the food there is definitely not cheap - as you can see on the ticket itself, the set costs about $9. Speaking of food, I am sure you must be eagerly anticipating savory photos to follow, but nope! Not in this episode anyway, but stay tuned 'cos there will definitely be more to come.

Out of the airport to hit the streets! The first thing one would notice about the streets in Japan are its orderliness - the lands are divided into small plots, where major and minor roads are interspersed between these plots:

Street in Osaka

However, by observing closely, it can be seen that there are certain things about Japanese roads that are quite different from that of in Singapore. Firstly, the wordings on the road are in Japanese (DUH!!). And they have lots of zebra crossings - I means LOTS. Back here, the part where passengers are permitted to cross are denoted by two parallel white lines, but in Japan, they are all represented by zebra crossings - even diagonal ones. Some roads even have specially allocated bicycle lanes! In addition, their traffic lights have no buttons, so all you can do is to just stand and wait. Fortunately, the green man seems to appear more frequently than in Singapore, so waiting isn't really an issue.

What's another thing that you will notice that is markedly different from Singapore? It's the weather. Granted, I haven't really experienced how their summer is like, the temperature now is ideal for trips and living. It's temperature range is at a cool 15C to about 25C, which is on average, about 10C lower than what's in Singapore. Don't believe? See the weather forecast below:

Weather prediction board - found in a hostel!

Another good thing is, you hardly ever sweat! Unlike here, where merely making a trip to the supermarket would reward you with a sweaty T-shirt. However, the cold and dry weather might lead to symptoms such as parched lips and flaky skin - both of which had been experienced by me, and those are definitely downsides to the otherwise wonderful weather.

That was a lot of information, wasn't it? However...one post is definitely insufficient to cover the vast amount of wonders witnessed there. I have to stop here for the time being, but I promise there's more to come. ;) Stay tuned!

It's all over - after 4 years

It is finally over. After a long journey of 4 years, my sojourn at NUS has finally come to an end - marked by my final paper yesterday, which finished at 3pm. The moment when I walked out of the exam room, I suddenly felt my shoulders are completely free of burden - wait. Free of burden? Not exactly true...'cos there are bigger things to do after this! However, I am just gonna enjoy this moment, which I have very much so earned it - after countless hours of mugging, headache, sleepless nights, late journeys home, and what nots.

Looking back at the four years in university, I can't really say that it has been an ideal experience, for many reasons. Perhaps mixed with a heavy dose of idealism, I have always wanted varsity life to be a colorful one - one that has many components to it: lesser focus on studies, work opportunities, chances to meet tons of people, partying, outings and stuff. However, after going through everything, I am sad to say that a major part of university life is still buried in books, notes, lectures and midnight oil. I consider myself to be quite hardworking already, but as the saying goes: "for a tall mountain, there is bound to be (at least) one taller than that". This feeling is amplified whenever I passed by the YIH study rooms when nearing exam periods - there would already be students 'camping' there to study, some of them even overnight. I am sure this is so too in other parts of the school. I have to hold my hands up though, that I can never mug this hard - and seriously, I don't see why I should despite knowing the perennial importance of grades here.

My experience with the chemical engineering course is also a relatively rocky one - there have been times when I was really struggling, the stuff that I was studying just cannot get into my head, or worse, look absolutely alien to me. There were a couple of modules that I nearly failed, or so I thought, but fortunately, I didn't. The multitudes of modules that I took did open my eyes to many things though, to the facets of chemical engineering and beyond. It is a very tough course alright, and to be able to make it through is, in itself, an achievement.

Due to the heavy academic commitments, most of the people I got to meet and socialize with naturally came from my course - and there are a few that are truly formidable in terms of ability. I am also being exposed to pseudo-political maneuvrings and undercurrents, which made me sick to the stomach in some instances, to still see some of them and be able to tide over the awkward moments with feigned smiles. Those that have been there before, you know what I mean. Not that I like it, no one does, but we all have to deal with it. It is, after all, part and parcel of the route of maturity and independence. But if you ask me whether I would select this course again if given a choice, I would give you a negative answer. Once is enough, I would like to try something else. For an over-engagement in mechanical stuff does make one lose a bit of edge in terms of fulfilment of relational needs and sociability.

That said, I feel that I have gone through a lot, and learned aplenty too. And as I hit my quarter life mark, things are chugging on faster than usual, I have noticed. But I have to bite the bullet and carry on. And to the one that I thought was the one, it was a short, bittersweet memory that I will never forget, forlornly so - just that fate does not ordain us to walk the same path. Anyhow, you can bet that one day I would emerge with the hand of the other. So long.

I was at the Bloggers' Calendar 2009 launch

In mid-December of 2008, I took part in the photoshoot for Bloggers' Calendar 2009. Two separate sessions were held then, and I went for the later one. The session, which was held in Willy Foo's LiveStudios, was a fun and vibrant one as I experienced for the first time what it was like to be a photo model (although I have to admit that I am not photogenic, haha). It also got me excited that my photo, along with approximately 20-odd other bloggers, will be appearing in the calendar itself. And needless to say, it also got me expectant of the formal launch itself.

The launch was held yesterday evening at Ice Cold B's in SMU. I was amongst one of the earlier ones to reach, and hence I also laid my hands on the calendar relatively quicker. It was packed in a neat little plastic casing as shown in the picture below:

Nice idea by the way, to have the bloggers lined up below - the only downside is, it's too small to be seen!

Anyway, back to the event. As I was sitting around listening and chatting to those who were there (e.g. Brennan, Robert and Mohan), the other participants gradually arrived too. As the place was rather small and cosy, we were sort of huddled up and split into small groups as we chatted. Dinner was served at around 7 plus, along with a menu of liquors that the outlet serves. However, not being a fan of alcoholic drinks, I didn't order any of them (reason being - I don't really like the taste of liquor, so I don't really understand how some people manage to finish a few bottles of it...well, to each his/her own). Anyway, the standard of dinner was good enough for me to help myself with two servings.

As the participants busy themselves with their meals and the discussions, I also noticed that there was one photographer who was moving around to take pictures - OK, that's probably pretty normal, you would say. What amazed me was the speed and precision at which the photos were processed - I was handed a couple of them with me included within minutes! Here's a snapshot of the 'freshly prepared' photos:

That was impressive, if you asked me. :p

At around 9pm, another guest arrived at the scene - and this one's not a human.

It's a gaming console - the Wii! I have a gaming console at home as well, but it's a PS3, so handling a Wii was yet another novel experience for me. The hot game of the night was the Rayman Rabbids - I have heard of it before, seen the screenshots but have not tried it. Now I could.

The game itself consists of several continents in the world, within which contains 5 different mini-games each. Up to four players could participate simultaneously, and a point tallying system is used - the player with the lowest gross total receives a roll of toilet paper (LOL). And so I managed to play in all the continents - the bulk of the game was based on a sense of wackiness, humor and novelty. There were a few that I particularly liked, such as the handphone-in-the-cinema and bumper cars mini-game. The fun was contagious as the audience had as much of it as the players.

In my opinion, the Wii is a nice alternative in the gaming market, although I personally still prefer my PS3. The former's useful for occasions such as friends' gathering such as yesterday's though.

The night drew to a close for me slightly past 10pm, although several bloggers stayed to carry on with whatever was left. And so I packed and left with fond memories and a copy of the Calendar.

FYP report - done and dusted, lessons learned

This is it. It is finally completed after 5 months of blood and sweat (LOL OK, I am exaggerating here, but you know what I mean). After the submission of a soft copy has been completed, a hard copy is also required. And so it was properly compiled, printed and bound. Before parting with it, I decided to take a final snapshot of it:

FYP Report - 21 July 2008 to 18 December 2008

When I held this report in my hand, there was a deep feeling of satisfaction - not only does it signify that I, too, can be like any of the seniors, work and produce something primarily out of my own endeavor, but also signify that I am approaching the end of my tertiary, and possibly, my formal education. Whether or not there will be Masters or Doctorate following up, I am not sure, and I am not thinking about them at the moment.

Right now, I just want to bask in the delight of completing something so momentous, as well as share some of my experiences gained from doing FYP with my readers - particularly if you have not done one yourself:

1). Get a good professor

There is nothing like having a good, supportive and readily available boss. Hence, it is better to choose someone whom you know had, or will build a good rapport with you. Obtain advices from your senior as to which professor is better to work with. It's never a good feeling when you cannot find any help when you need them.

2). Persistence

FYP is likely to be one of your longest academic engagements as compared to all your other work, hence persistence is definitely needed here. Few people can land those titles which require only a month or two of work, so be prepared to tune yourself mentally for the long haul. There will be ups and downs, as with all other things in life - hence, it is crucial not to lose heart and focus.

3). Be clear of your path

Before you embark on the project, make sure you thoroughly, or at least understand the majority of what you are doing. Obtain a clear comprehension of all the big and small goals the project entail, but also bear in mind that sometimes, the professor might want you to change one or two things. Being flexible and negotiable are definite plusses here.

4). Consistency

This is probably one of the most important factors that would determine whether your FYP journey would be a smooth or a tension-filled one. Although it is part of human nature to procrastinate, I can safely say that six months, or even a year, is after all not a very long time. We all know how time flies, so try spreading out the work. Every little bit of progress is positive.

5). Communication

By communication, it can refer to anything between you and your professor, post-doctorate, or others, such as the course mates sharing the same equipments with you. Try keeping things polite and respectful, and they would be more likely to co-operate with you. Sure, there will be some people who don't fit into your good books, but not everyone does, right?

6). The final outcome

The unique thing about FYP is that nearly all of the students will be working on different topics, hence the bell curve grading system does not apply. Hence, what would the report be graded based on? If you are thinking that only positive results would get you a good grade, I would say not totally true. One thing of note is that a successful research usually spans over a period of several years and it can be a tad demanding to expect a student to yield marked discoveries over the period of six months to a year. Hence, the crux here is to demonstrate what you have learned and achieved, as well as a positive attitude throughout the course of the project.

Oh and, not forgetting to maintain a good relationship with your professor.

Hope you will enjoy your very own FYP journey!

I am back to blogging!

First post in about two months!! Ugh. This has been my longest hiatus so far since I started blogging about 7 months ago. A long time isn't it? Some of you readers might be wondering where I went to...yes, the conjecture is right, if yours is 'he must be busy'. Yup, I was busy. Damn busy, if you asked me...so much so that I am bereft of inspirations to blog. Heck, I might have forgotten that I have a blog but luckily, the presence of Plurk did help remind me of that. What is this Plurk thing then, you may wonder. Well, then you have to stay tuned to my next episode(s) of blogging.

This semester had been a relatively easy one, in the academic sense but a tough one in terms of multi-tasking. Especially in the middle part, where the companies made a beeline to give campus recruitment talks. There's not much allowance when you have to juggle your daily lessons, FYP, as well as draft some sensible-looking resumes so that the companies might consider calling you for an interview. And not to mention, having to deal with some idiots that simply got into your bones. I'd let that pass, though.

Just in case you ask, nope, the FYP is not over yet. Far from it, in fact...and I am blogging in the midst of doing characterization for my concoctions, praying that no freak results would come out. And yup, I would most certainly need to get my social life back on track on these crazy period is over. It had better be quick.

Alrighty, that's about all. There will be better posts than this once my blogging inspirations come flooding back, and you can be sure of that.

Intuitions. Do you trust them?

Intuitions. The power of knowing or understanding something without having to think hard. Or call it 'sixth sense' if you want. They may not be exactly the same, but they do come close I feel. In my opinion, such a 'skill' is complementary to logical thinking, and is a good defense mechanism when logical thinking does not seem to derive you the answers you want. At least, it works for me. Strange eh? Considering this is coming from a guy...although it is commonly said that women have better intuitions than men.

Let me cite you a few examples then:

1). There was once, or rather twice, or maybe even more, when I had strong intuitions before I receive my exam paper. On the first occasion, it was in secondary 2, just before I receive my history paper. I had a strong hunch that I was going to get a certain score...and what's creepy was, the score on that paper actually matched my hunch seamlessly! And then there was this other occasion when I took back my Physics mid-term paper. I also had this strong feeling that I was going to do exceptionally well. And turned out, it did.

2). Now, this one was not that pleasant. I was seeing this girl not very long ago...it was my first flame, and we clicked, so I was thinking why not give it a go again. But on a particular Saturday, I had this weird feeling throughout the entire day. It's like a deep sense of sorrow, as if my heart had been carved open...and guess what? Something unpleasant happened between her and her friend that very night...and my heart was battered. I then decided that it would be wise to move on, as there is no point keeping someone who's heart is not with you.

Also, there are countless other times when I had small hunches which, more often than not, proved to be right. Such as when I feel something amiss about an individual, something is bound to happen later.

I have always pride myself as a logical person...but one's brain can only bring you so far. Maybe I should also learn to listen and trust the vibes that my heart gives out.

So how about you then? Do you trust yours?

What makes landing a job you want difficult? My two cents

Alright, so I am at the crossroads of life now. The transitional period, so to speak. Hence, the issue of job search naturally comes to mind. The economy is bad, everyone knows it, I know it too, but none of us can help it...except do our best in the things we are in control of. Recently, I went to a couple of career talks held within my school and the hiring rates were, as expected, not good. Not good at all...even for renowned MNCs. Which makes things even harder, with ever increasing number of graduates and ever diminishing number of vacancies.

I shan't go into techniques of writing resumes and such...those, I believe, are already very well-documented. What makes securing a job that you want difficult is, I feel, the intricacies that are involved within each and every facet of the process before the confirmation:

1). The search

The big search is on, and you eagerly collect information from a variety of sources, such as from friends, career advisers, the internet, newspapers, etc. The number of choices look dazzlingly kaleidoscopic, and you are undecided.

Some of the packages seem very tempting, but things are not always what they seem.

2). Resumes

Deciding what to write, and what not to write. You don't want to sound like a broken record. You have to try and magnify whatever contributions you have had in the past to demonstrate your qualities without sounding unreliable and boastful. It's even harder if the things you did somehow seemed less 'significant' than others.

Oh, and not to mention, your resumes must not look like they have been photocopied.

Always a tough one.

3). Psychological roller-coaster

So, after some effort, you have finally sent out copies of resumes...and you wait. And wait. And wait. Good for you if you manage to get a call or mail for further clarification, or an interview. But if you don't...it's back to square one again. The anxiety from the expectations and anticipation can really wear a person down by a lot, especially if it has dragged on for months.

Brace yourself!

4). Matching

Matching can mean a lot of things. Matching between the company's goal/vision and yours. The compatibility of your personality, qualifications and experiences with what's required of the job. The list goes on and on...

And I personally feel that matching of the 'software' (e.g. personality, goal and vision) is tougher than those of 'hardware' (e.g. qualifications) as they are often more covert, so to speak.

5). Politics and relations

Well...in every part of the world, such things can either make or break a deal...regardless of how complete your matching process is. I shan't go further.

The bottom line is: humans are overly complicated. Sometimes, too much for our own good.

6). Interviews

Now that you have been shortlisted, the battle is on! It's a chance for you to shine, but things can turn out really badly if you are not prepared...just imagine getting bombarded with the most prying, difficult type of questions by a panel of judges, with your every action and word analyzed.

I have undergone a 1.5 hour interview before. Trust me, I was already 50% brain-dead around halfway through the interview. I was amazed even myself that I had enough energy to board the MRT later on...

7). Negotiation

Finally, you are one of the fortunate few that passed through numerous acid tests and they have invited you for contract negotiation. But it's not done and dusted yet...there are still a few traps to look out for. Failing those could send you out before the last hurdle.

I am sure my turn to experience all these are fast arriving, so I have to be prepared for the battles ahead. But I will not shirk the challenge. All the best to me!!

I had my hand on 4 other girls'!!!

Good gracious. I don't think it has ever happened before, me touching the hands of the other four girls'! And examining them at close range, admiring their suppleness and softness. To add, I can tell who, out of the four, had been doing household chores...unlike the other three. I wonder how you would have felt if you were in my position. ;)

Now...you must be thinking: how come I am so humsup right? Wrong! I am not, 'cos I am decent. Hahaha. And I didn't do that just because I liked to. It's because one of the girls, R, mentioned about palmistry during a conversation...and so, I helped them to do a free analysis.

Let's call the other three girls as A, B and S.

Before I say anything, I would like to first state that...I am half a pail of water when it comes to palmistry. Or 半桶水 in Chinese. I do know a bit, not much, but good enough for brief explanation.

Think of your palm as an uneven, barren plain with three main rivers and a multitude of creeks and tributaries. These three main rivers are termed as the relationship (top), intellect (middle) and life (bottom) lines. There is also a (usually) vertical line that runs from the base of your palm to somewhere beneath your fourth finger, or in between your middle and fourth finger. I have even seen slanted ones. This line is your career line.

Notice the short, horizontal lines below the base of your little finger? Those indicate how many relationships you are likely to have. The deepest line indicate marriage. The depth of each line also indicates the depth of each relationship.

Since I am no expert, I will give the most general rules in reading palmistry:

1). The lines should preferably be deep and easily visible, like being cut through by a blade
2). The lines should preferably not be broken
3). It is more favorable that there aren't too many 'tributaries' on your palm
4). If there are chain-like and/or criss-cross formations on one or more of your lines, it means you are likely to run into difficulties in those areas
5). Based on the orientation and position of the line(s), different meanings can be derived from it
6). For males, the left hand signifies the readings before 50. For females, refer to your right hand. Naturally, the other hand signifies those after 50
7). Lines do change, albeit slowly

HOKAY!! That's it for now. Just wanna share it with all of you 'cos I find it interesting.

And last but not least, palmistry is just for reference only...

Enjoy reading your palms!

Guess what am I doing, all alone inside a lecture hall?

The semester's getting busy, so not much time to blog. And no inspirations too...unless people wants to know what I have been cooking up in the lab. Hahahaha. Hmm. Anyway, now I am all alone inside the Engineering Auditorium. What do you think I am doing? Taking a chance to catch a nap? Surfing some boliao websites? Digging my nose? Catching up with some readings that are so un-read for the past couple of weeks? Plurking?

None of them are right! In fact, I am multi-tasking. I don't know why, but I love doing that. Reading stuff + blogging + enjoying the air-con and hoping that I don't die of coldness cometh 6pm. Hahaha. Just being boliao here. Life has too much things to do sometimes...and I must learn to take a break from time to time.

As for those who saw my Plurk a few days ago, don't worry, I am getting better and better. Some things just do not come at the right time...and I will leave it at that. Anyway, I am too busy to be bothered about it.

Alright...that's it for now. Stay tuned for further updates. As I may, just may, be struck by a new inspiration again.

Ciao~

Singapore claims silver medal in ladies' table tennis final

I usually do not watch table tennis, as I find soccer more attractive. However, for once, I have decided to do so. Primarily because Singapore managed to secure an Olympic medal after a barren spell that stretches over nearly half a century, and also due to my curiosity to see which color will that medal be. The matches commenced duly at approximately 7.45pm, and my, what an enthralling competition it was between Singapore and China. Here are the summary of the scores and the respective sets:

Wang Nan defeats Feng Tian Wei: 9-11, 11-3, 11-8, 11-6

Feng Tian Wei started the match-up with gusto, clinching the first match 11-9. However, as the match wore on, Wang Nan's experience began to show as she drew Feng Tian Wei into a series of mistakes, particularly a few wild, skied returns. Feng continued to fight valiantly, but the gulf in experience is too wide for a miracles to occur.

Zhang Yi Ning defeats Li Jiawei: 9-11, 11-3, 11-4, 11-7

In the past, Zhang Yi Ning have encountered Li Jiawei a total of 13 times and have lost none of them, hence it is up to Li to overturn the form books. Li started brightly to claim the first match 11-9, albeit with a bit of jitters. However, Zhang's class began to show from the second match onwards, her fast and ferocious strokes proving very tough for Li to deal with. A couple of her shots were perfectly measured, just clipping the edge of the table before bouncing out. Consequentially, Zhang's victory meant China were 2-0 ahead.

Zhang Yi Ning/Guo Yue defeated Li Jiawei/Wang Yue Gu: 11-8, 11-5, 11-6

In the final match-up, Li Jiawei and Wang Yue Gu faced up to the Chinese duo of Zhang Yi Ning and Guo Yue. The Singapore duo began well, racing into a 4-0 lead at one stage. However, their opponents were assured, clawing back point by point before clinching the first match. In the second and third matches, the China duo were visibly nippier than the Singapore duo, forcing Li and Wang to make a series of errors. It was inevitable that China would also eventually claim the set.

Hence, the final score is - China 3 Singapore 0.

The score looked overwhelming, but looking at the purely the score would be understating the effort of the Singapore team. It is always going to be difficult playing on foreign soil, especially up against some of the world's best table tennis players on their home soil. The kind of pressure these athletes were under are scarcely imaginable to us spectators.

From a personal point of view, the quality of the matches were one of the best I have ever seen. The pace of the game hardly allowed a reprieve and the techniques on display, breathtaking. Although Singapore had lost, I still applaud the athletes for the enthusiasm, fight, skill and dedication they have shown throughout the tournament to have landed the country, a long-awaited medal.

Well done, Singapore!

So what does your name mean?

I was chatting on the shoutbox with a few pingsters last night, and zhane brought up the topic of 'counting life' (算命), also known as fortune telling. And gradually, the topic shifted to 'name counting', which is a form of fortune telling whereby your name is analyzed. So, I decided to share some of my knowledge regarding the topic here. The general rules of 'name counting' are as follows:

1). Only Chinese characters are considered. Hence, Christian names are not considered

2). The name must be written in Chinese traditional form

3). There are a total of five numbers that can be derived from any Chinese name. They are the heaven (天格), human (人格), earth (地格), external (外格) and total (总格) numbers. Only the last four are meaningful as the surname is fixed.

4). Heaven number (天格) is obtained by adding 1 to your surname

5). Human number (人格) is obtained by adding the strokes of your first and second characters together. It exerts an influence over the entire stretch of your life, and is particularly influential over youth. It also symbolizes a person's personality and character

6). Earth number (地 格) is obtained by adding the strokes of your second and third characters together. It exerts an influence prior to middle age and is representative of one's offspring and spouse

7). External number (外 格) is obtained by adding 1 to the third character. It determines the nature of energy governing your life. In addition, it also governs the nature of interaction between one and the others, such as friends, family members, the public, etc

8). Total number (总 格) is the summation of all three characters in your name. It exerts an influence over the latter stages of middle age to old age

9). For surnames with more than one character (e.g. 公孙), the strokes are summed up as one character

10). For names with only one character, the 'second character' is represented by 1. For example, for Chinese athlete Liu Xiang (刘翔), his earth number (地 格) will be 13 strokes (12 strokes from 翔 + 1)

11). Characters with special sides may be counted specially, for example, the surname Guo (郭) has 15 strokes in 'name counting' as the 'ear' part (耳) is counted as 7 strokes when it's placed on the right

12). Each strokes have an element attached to it. These elements are wood (X1, X2), fire (X3, X4), earth (X5, X6), metal (X7, X8) and water (X9, X0), where X is an positive integer inclusive of 0

13). The compatibility of elements affect the name positively or negatively. They are summarized as follows:

- Compatible: wood and fire, fire and earth, earth and metal, metal and water, water and wood

- Opposes: wood and earth, fire and metal, earth and water, metal and wood, water and fire

Here's an example:

Chairman Mao (毛泽东) is the founder of Chinese Communist Party in 1921. According to 'name counting' rules, his name to be used is the Chinese traditional style, 毛澤東. By applying the rules, his numbers are as follow -

Heaven number (天格) - 5 strokes (element: earth)

Human number (人格) - 21 strokes (element: wood)

Earth number (地 格) - 25 strokes (element: earth)

External number (外 格) - 9 strokes (element: water)

Total number (总 格) - 29 strokes (element: water)

From his name, it can be seen that he has leadership qualities (21 strokes) but his life is generally laden with a lot of hardships (9 strokes).

Each and every stroke have its unique meaning. Due to its length, they are not described in this post. However, the auspicious nature of the numbers are listed below:

Auspicious strokes

1, 3, 5, 6, 7, 8, 11, 13, 15, 16, 17, 18, 21, 23, 24, 25, 31, 32, 33, 35, 37, 39, 41, 45, 47, 48, 52, 57, 61, 63, 65, 67, 68, 81

Semi-auspicious strokes

12, 14, 26, 27, 29, 38, 51, 58, 71, 73, 75, 77, 78

Inauspicious strokes

2, 4, 19, 20, 22, 28, 30, 34, 36, 40, 42, 43, 44, 46, 49, 50, 53, 54, 55, 56, 59, 60, 62, 64, 66, 69, 70, 72, 74, 76, 79, 80

For total number exceeding 80 strokes, the counter is reset (e.g. For a total of 87 strokes, the explanation is identical to that for 7 strokes).

Disclaimer: This post is made out of fun and to answer some of the question posted last night in the shoutbox. 'Name counting' is by no means a 'be all end all' thing, it just serves as a form of reference. Life is a very complicated thing, and the 'auspiciousness' of one's name is only partially influential.

After all, some do say that '30% of your life is pre-determined, 70% of your life is determined by you'.

Peace out.

A response to 'send all princesses to army'

In relation to this post 'send all princesses to army' and some of the things I have learned these couple of years, I find that it is getting harder and harder to be a guy, especially in the romantic aspect. The so-called 'dating rules' just keep changing all the time, so much so that sometimes I feel rather tired of catching up.

A few years back, during my JC days, I came across this term 'SNAG' or 'Sensitive New Age Guy', where the guy is supposed to adopt certain originally considered feminine qualities such as being sensitive, caring, compassionate, blah blah blah. This is quite different from the traditional qualities that guys should have, such as being daring, able to shoulder responsibilities. chivalrous, etc.

Then, in these couple of years, I came across a new set of 'doctrine' on how guys should behave in the romantic aspect. The mastermind of this 'doctrine' is none other than David DeAngelo. In his 'doctrine', he argued that guys should possess, fundamentally, the following qualities in order to be successful in the romantic aspect:

1). Maintaining a 'tension' in the courtship and relationship
2). Be cocky and funny
3). Do not be a wussy (take: SNAG)

Follow these rules, or otherwise remain as a chronic failure, he claims.

Quite a lot of qualities to have, isn't it? (I summarized the things he preach, hence it's down to three points) This is especially hard for guys who do not have them in the first place, me included (although I am trying to pick up some of them).

Lately, I have also came across a forum whereby some female forummers left their ex, despite being treated very well, as they 'did not find the guy to be a challenge' or 'is confused'. Confused by what? Only God knows.

Seriously, I think the reasons they gave are rubbish. You have someone who tends to all your needs, what more do you want?

I guess I do not need to repeat that guys need to have a stable career, thick purse loadings, own a car, plus a house, etc etc...on top of all these, we need to know how 'the game' works. Strangely enough, I do not seem to come across a similar set of 'doctrine' for the girls.

Perhaps it's time for someone to come up with that.

Formulation of a new...relationship theory!

Had a short conversation with a friend, A, who is in US now for a work-and-travel program. I have known him for more than a decade, so he qualifies as an old friend. Conversation was great and midway through things, we touched on the topic of relationships. So it went something like this:

A: So how are things over at your side?

Me: No good. Hit a rock lately.

A: How come?

Me: I don't know...it's kind of sucky I guess. (Briefly told him my situation)

A: You should persevere!

Me: Sometimes perseverance is useless...especially if that person is not doing the same, or not worth your perseverance

[The conversation went on for quite some time. I can't really remember all the details. However, I came up with a theory of my own, which I did not expect I would in the first place]

Me: When you fall for someone, everything about him/her seems to be perfect.

Me: But when time passes, his/her flaws will start to show. His/her 'rating' in your eyes will start to drop.

Me: It keeps on dropping...until a level where it somehow stabilizes. At that point, you have roughly attained a good understanding of how 'sucky' your other half is.

Me: And if you can accept this level of suckiness, he/she can soon become your spouse!

OK there. I know I am oversimplifying things, but isn't this a rough picture of how things progress in a relationship? Although it is human nature to always be at our best, this, shall I say the somewhat false 'image' would gradually deteriorate over time and our real self will show (though not completely). Usually, the person who gets to see the protracted deterioration of the 'image' is our the other half.

And this pseudo-stability may change after marriage too. It usually gets worse...although occasionally, the level of suckiness of this other half that you are with may decrease. May only.

Thanks for reading!

Peace out~

ping.sg 2nd Anniversary - A success

The day was 19 July at around 2.30pm. I sauntered out of Dhoby Ghaut MRT station and was welcomed by a warm sunny weather, as I headed for the destination: Fig & Olive. Not too many people on the road, which was good, as I would not be late for the final preparation before the party starts. The journey was relatively smooth and within a quarter of an hour, I had reached the doorsteps of the outlet.

Preparations: An overview

As I stepped inside, not too many pingsters were there at first. Converged around two tables were about six pingsters, including NTT and daphne who were dabbling with the presentation slides and scripts for the final time. The atmosphere was casual, with most of the stuff already in place for the event.

Gradually, more and more of the committee members arrived with the necessary stuff. The cupcakes department was the first to be ready, with 64 of the sweet thingies all hiding inside the three big cardboard boxes, awaiting to be devoured. The envelope department caught up rather quickly too, with approximately 80 envelopes quickly settled by us few pingsters. Following suit are the souvenirs and audio/video departments, which brushed up their work before registration time with minimal fuss.

And I, too, grabbed a ping.sg T-shirt for myself. My first ping.sg T-shirt! Another free T-shirt to my wardrobe, although I...still haven't wore it. Yet.

The game

Now cometh one of the most exciting parts of the anniversary itself - The Pong & Poof Game! Some of the pingsters started 'attacking' others with the stickers right away, with a few of them being the popular targets for these 'attacks'. I got 'attacked' a few times as well, but not as many as the one that eventually won - the little girl who's got so many stickers on her name tag that, one would really struggle to count the exact number of the stickers.

It's presentation time!

At approximately 4pm, NTT and mintea commenced the award ceremony in tandem. Awards were given out without major hiccups, in the witness of a throng of excited pingsters. Conclusively, there wasn't a single moment of boredom within the ceremony itself.

Second round of mingling plus dinner

Due to the awards presentation finishing slightly earlier than expected (at around 5.30pm), dinner was not ready yet. Hence, the time was ripe for the unveiling of the cupcakes! 64 cupcakes, nicely arranged on a round table, was wheeled out in eager anticipation of the pingsters. A pleasant contrast was achieved in the use of the color schemes of the cake, with blue letter toppings or whitish-blue little decorations and the chocolate at the bottom sandwiching a rather thick layer of the cream in the middle. The texture and feel of the cake had the right amount of thickness, without an overly strong aroma.

The only (minor) joke of the day was...I mistook the dragees as metal balls -_- and I actually wondered why would I be needing iron supplements when I am not suffering from iron deficiency...

Anyway! Dinner was promptly served while we were busying finishing our cupcakes. A good variety of dishes were served buffet-style, and I had my share too. The food deserved between 7 to 8 marks, out of a total of 10! During this period, I also had the chance to interact with some of the pingsters which I have never seen before.

Lipdub video

Next up was the lipdub video, the masterful concoction directed by rinaz and helped out by a group of pingsters. And I have to say that, it was amazing! I have never done one myself and I didn't know it can be so humorous. (Well I had the chance to, but I was bogged down by other stuffs so I couldn't contribute =() I would definitely want to do one if I get a next chance. Heh.

Lucky draw!

After the sponsors' speech and presentation of the blog, as well as post of the year award, the final event of the day was the lucky draw. The funny thing was, prior to the draw itself, I actually had a premonition that I would be one of the winners. I don't know why, but my sixth sense usually would not fail me. And it did not, as I got myself a $20 Borders voucher! Time to shop for some books~haha.

Aftermath

The lucky draw was then succeeded by group phototaking, of which the camera lady expertly managed to squeeze all the pingsters into her photo frame. Looking outside, it was already 8pm, with the roads wetted by drizzles. As some of the pingsters geared up for the after party-party at Timbre, I had to make a move first as I had a long day prior to the anniversary.

And so off I go, making my way slowly back to the train station and beyond. The air was slightly cold, but it could not douse my mood as it had been a successful anniversary. Hope that ping.sg will get better and better!

Life lessons that I have learnt...so far

Been busy with my FYP readings these few days and haven't had the chance or inspiration to update my blog. Now I have. Hahaha. Something emotionally shocking happened a few days back, but I am gradually putting the pieces together again. Crises and misfortunes occur all the time throughout one's life, so it's your choice whether to come out stronger or raise your white flag. Though it is rather tempting to choose the second option (for the lack of fight), I have always picked the first choice.

I have a strong inclination towards deep thinking. Some friends of mine may find this statement intriguing, because they only see the crappy side of me the majority of the time. I do have a serious side as well, although not so evident at times. Admittedly, what's the use of thinking so much? I don't have the answer to my questions most of the time, but isn't life itself about continually exploring until you find the answers? It may take you 10, 20 years to find the answer. Perhaps you will never find the answer. Still, I persist staying on the road I have taken thus far.

Although 20+ years of life isn't that long, I did learn some things, some of which came from literature, others from personal experiences...most I did not once believe religiously until now...

1). Fight for the things you can fight for. Those that you cannot, just try your best and hope for the best

2). Think of how others feel before you say or act

3). Stand up for yourself when the situation requires you to

4). Accumulate as much good karma as you can, it will work for you nicely in future

5). Realize the importance of prioritization and flexible time management. It is never a good idea to cram your schedule and make your lifestyle extremely tense

6). Love with a true heart, without deception. Those that do not treasure are their losses anyway

7). No matter how popular you are, there is always someone who loves to go against you

8). Sometimes it is good to maintain a low profile. High profile attracts envy, jealousy and troubles alike

9). Act fast when an opportunity passes by. Let too many pass, and your life will be full of regrets

10). Care about those who genuinely cares about you as well

10 lessons. There may be more, but that's all I can think of for now. I am sure more lines will be added to this list as the new chapters in my life unfold...

I ran away from school and went uncaught for 208 days!!

The exodus...had officially ended yesterday. Yup, I am not joking...I counted. I was away from school for 208 days. When I stepped back into the school, I had to take a bit of time to figure out where to go to a couple of places. Everything looks familiar yet a tad distant, refreshing yet nostalgic. Ah. Feels so good to run away from school...

Now...what were you thinking? I was away from school because of attachment lah. I am such a good student OK~why would I do such a thing? xD Then, why did I decide to go back then, you ask? It was to meet my professor to discuss how to kick start my FYP... =p

It was approximately 2.30pm. Time for the meeting. I was a bit apprehensive as for one, I have never met that professor before (I selected the project based on recommendations) and two, it was actually my very first time during the three years in school, that I am visiting a professor alone for discussion. And so...gingerly, I knocked on the door. After a few knocks, he asked me to go in and I did.

After roughly half an hour, I was out of his office. Not a bad first meeting, I guess. I was briefed on the framework of my project...and it sounded...chim (OK OK, which FYP title is not chim?) But I have the confidence to do it, as I find it interesting and do know a bit of stuff related to the project.

Subsequently, I went to see a co-supervisor and received some administrative instructions. That's formal, you think. But the focus is not here. The focus was...I actually walked the wrong direction before I realized my mistake. Well...that's what a long exodus from your familiar environment can do to you... =(

Anyway, this re-embarkation onto the school compound marked the beginning of another journey. What will happen on this journey? I don't know, but I hope everything can go as smoothly as possible.

Peace out~